Noir at the Bar

 

"Come on in and please grab yourself a drink or two before we start, you'll want to brace yourself for these stories of crime and transgression from the scourge of St. Louis's literate."
—Noir at the Bar

WARM REACTIONS TO N@B FROM PILLARS OF THE CRIME FICTION COMMUNITY:

"I've told you repeatedly that I do not give blurbs and in any event, I wouldn't dream of giving one for this piece of crap. Don't even think of using my name or any words of mine to promote this drivel."
—Lawrence Block, author of A DROP OF THE HARD STUFF

"I'm not sure what offends me more about this morally and intellectually bankrupt venture—the waste of good booze, or the complete lack of entertainment value? Fuck these guys. Fuck them in their nostrils."
—Duane Swierczynski, Pulitzer Prize-winning author of POLE POSITION: A MEMOIR

"Short of climbing into a wringer box during a live magic act staged by Leopold and Loeb, it is hard to imagine a venue in which I'd less like to appear. And yet I've never been asked."
—Megan Abbott, author of THE END OF EVERYTHING

"Noir at the Bar is to crime fiction what Michael Jordan was...to crime fiction."
—Todd Robinson, editor of THUGLIT

"A collection of drunken scribbles lifted from beer coasters and restroom walls. Dark days indeed when barflies from flyover country are the keepers of the noir flame."
—Roger Smith, author of DUST DEVILS

"I hear that lost of fighting and fucking goes on at these things. Or there would, if anybody gave a shit enough to invite me. Stay classy, bitches."
—Tom Piccirilli, author of THE COLD SPOT

"Been hearing about these goings-on in St. Louis. I live a cool thousand miles away. And I'm thinking maybe that's too close."
—Stephen Graham Jones, author of THE ONES THAT GOT AWAY

"Like...it...full of...Good..."
—Sara Gran, author of CLAIRE DEWITT AND THE CITY OF THE DEAD

Table of Contents:
Foreword, Jed & Scott
Gunpowder & Aluminum Foil, Matthew McBride
One Fine Bird, Cameron Ashley
The Girl Who Kissed Barnaby Jones, Scott Phillips
Thin Mints, Daniel O’Shea
Doe Run Road, Dennis Tafoya
They Take You, Kyle Minor
Deviances, Frank Bill
Pig Helmet & The Wall of Life, Pinckney Benedict
An Orphan’s Tale, Jonathan Woods
Ballad of Larry Plank, Derek Nikita
Five Revelations Concerning Jenny L. as Told to Maura C. by a Compassionate Angel, Laura Benedict
Care of the Circumcised Penis, Sean Doolittle
The Morning After, Jedidiah Ayres
Underground Wonder Bound, Richard Thomas
Outside Lou’s, David Cirillo, Illustrations by Matt Kindt
Everyone Grieves in a Unique Way, Anthony Neil Smith
Big Artie, Malachi Stone
Vampires are Pussies, Chris La Tray
Afterword, Rod Wiethop